Sunflower is screening at OFN LGBTQIA+ Film Festival on Saturday, 16th November. BOOK TICKETS
In her recent concession speech, American Vice President Kamala Harris quoted philosopher Ralph Waldo Emerson and many others throughout history in saying, “Only when it is dark enough can you see the stars.” It’s a quote that resonates with many of us, and for LGBTQIA+ people, it reflects the challenging journey to freedom that every one of us takes at a different time in our lives. Unlike heterosexual or cis-gendered people, society insists we ‘come out,’ and this life-changing process often happens when we are in our teens or early twenties, at a point in our lives when we also need connection, friends, belonging and safety.
Heterosexual and cisgender people will never fully understand just how complicated, transformative, and intense this process can be or how long it can take, with self-acceptance the first hurdle in societies that continue to label us as ‘different.’ Following that self-acceptance, we then face the hurdle of telling people who we are and who we love and the potential backlash that may come with it. While some of us are greeted with love and support, far too many still face bullying, fear, violence and abuse just for being themselves. Gabriel Carrubba’s Sunflower is about the challenges and complexities LGBTQIA+ people face in both the internal and external process of ‘coming out.’ To quote Ralph Waldo Emerson, Sunflower is a story that says, “Being yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.”
Set in the suburbs of Melbourne, seventeen-year-old Leo (Liam Mollica) spends most of his hours outside of school hanging around with his best friend, Boof (Luke J. Morgan). Like many teenage friendships, Boof and Leo are chalk and cheese, yet strangely drawn to each other all the same. Leo is just beginning to question his sexual orientation internally, and Boof is similarly questioning his desire for Leo in silence. Both engage in bouts of wrestling, mutual masturbation and sex talk, but neither can voice the desires that lie under the surface of their adolescent masculinity. Boof would face the violence and threat of his older brother if he were to ever act on any form of gay desire, and Leo isn’t sure how his close Greek-Italian family would react, but at least he knows it wouldn’t be through violence.
As Leo grapples with his inner feelings and the reality that he can’t offer his new girlfriend Monique (Olivia Fildes) everything she wants, the unspoken sexual tension with Boof spills over into a kiss that changes everything. Boof tells everyone at school that Leo came on to him, and darkness descends as Leo’s school and social life are engulfed by homophobia, bullying and violence. But, only when it is dark enough can you see the stars, and one star shines brighter than all the others, Leo’s brother’s closeted best friend, Cam (Jacob Pontil-Scala).
Speaking about Sunflower, director Gabriel Carrubba said, “Sunflower is a semi-biographical take on the tender years of my youth. The youth that was stripped from me. The youth that I spent with my heart in my mouth. Growing up, I felt alone and isolated, as if I was the only teenage boy struggling with my thoughts and feelings. I spent countless nights crying myself to sleep, wishing that one day I’d wake up cured of my gayness. Society made me feel like I was a monster. I saw no future, only darkness at the end of what I assumed to be a very short tunnel. I made this film to work through my own trauma, and in doing so, I hope to give queer teenagers hope— to show them that they are not alone, that they are perfectly fine just the way they are. My experience does not stand alone. My experience is the experience of many.” Sunflower does indeed reflect the experiences of many, including me. But does it offer us anything new in the crowded arena of LGBTQIA+ films that explore the complexities of the ‘coming out‘ process?
While Sunflower may follow the same narrative path of many LGBTQIA+ coming-of-age films, from Giant Little Ones (2018) to Get Real (1998), its strength, power, and beauty come from its authenticity and raw emotional impact. Sunflower is a film born from memory, and it’s the lived experience that shines through and touches the audience as each scene brings back memories of our own journey toward internal and external peace in a heteronormative world. Carrubba has crafted a film full of honesty that shines in the hands of a truly wonderful young cast led by the exceptional Liam Mollica. From the joys of teenage life, experimentation, and newfound freedom to the abject horror of isolation, victimisation, and rejection, Sunflower, like A Night in the Fields (2020), captures the raw intensity of teenage life and the complexities of adolescent masculinity, sexuality, identity, and friendship.
Sunflowers are celebrated for representing joy, life, enlightenment and growth. Carrubba’s film is about the rocky road LGBTQIA+ people walk from the darkness of doubt, fear and isolation to the light of freedom, expression and love. It’s about the moment, usually in our teens or twenties, when we accept ourselves and discard the fears that have kept us cocooned, our leaves unfurling as we finally stand proud, facing the warmth of a new sun.
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